Too Busy

Have you missed me?

I have missed the time I had been spending writing here, but lately it seems like that is a luxury for which there is no room. I thought I worked a lot before. Now I have had to cut out lots of little "extras", .... like writing in this blog.

So what have I been up to?

First, cleaning out space. A few weeks back I rented a dumpster. Nothing is more satisfying than clearing out lots of clutter, and ending up with space. Our basement was filled to the gills and beyond. It is gratifying to finally have begun to re-establish order where before it was sheer chaos.

Part of the motivation to do this was I was desperate for space. The Crane Project is taking up more and more room. Both storing the cranes, and work space to string cranes up on cables. My work spaces were becoming unworkable. The change has made a large space available to me in the basement, and now I can safely have them out of danger, and more easily do the work I need to do with them.

I also decided it was time I admit that my dining room had stopped being a dining room several years ago when I started selling lots of cranes. It had become my crane packaging and inventory area, and shipping area. But I never fully admitted that. Even though hosting a meal in the room would have been impossible.

So the hutch was cleared out, the table moved to a wall, and a second table brought into the room. My computer came downstairs, along with all my paperwork. Getting an order out the door has become more efficient. It is still chaotic because I have not had the time to organize my office "stuff", but already, it is feeling much better than what existed before. And my husband has taken over the office space upstairs. He has a place to read, to play his guitars, and do yoga.

I have set a tough schedule for myself to complete cranes for the Crane Project. Sixteen cranes a day. Seven days a week. Right now, I am two days behind schedule, or thirty-two cranes. I hope to make eight more before I go to bed tonight so that the deficit shrinks just a little. But it is gratifying to watch the number climb. I just crossed 800 cranes tonight. It is also stunning to see how many that is. And to realize that is it only a year and two months of a war that is already over five years in length.

The motivation for staying on schedule is because it may put me in position to "catch up" at about the time of the inaugural in January of 2009. I like the idea of that deadline. A karma shift of sorts.

The waxed paper cranes are getting folded here and there. I bring a bag with paper squares with me where ever I go. I have folded over 500, and received nearly 100 from other folders. Last night, about 15 to 20 were folded before and during my daughter's band concert. I even taught my dentist and her assistant how to fold cranes last week. I have a new idea that I will be working on in the coming days to recruit more folders.

I still don't know where this project will be installed. It is one of the first questions I get, and all I can say still is "I don't know." All I can do is trust. I am continuing my search for a place, as well as funding options. Filling out applications, and learning.

I have also been dealing with some difficult choices in my business. I will write more about that soon. All I can say for now was once I made the choice it felt better than it did when I was avoiding the inevitable. Once I crossed the dreaded line, answers and solutions seem to fall into place. I don't know how it will work out, but I do know I feel comfortable with my decision, regardless of the outcome.

For the time being, my posts will probably continue to be sporadic. This post is more scattered than I like, but I guess that is a reflection of my state of mind right now. A bit like a pinball bouncing around. Time to bounce back into my studio, and make a few more cranes....

What Do You Know?

It always surprises me how much insight is possible in the obvious. But it is only when we step outside our normal framework that we can perhaps have the vantage point to see.

When I began this journey into becoming a working crafts person, I found there were many steps and hurdles along the way. First, it was developing the technical skill with my material. I can still remember Nancy Markoe at a class at the Arts Business Institute. She was reminding us that no matter how much we learned and understood about the business of craft, in the end we had to also spend time in the studio, honing our skill. We had to be able to have our hands understand the material. She used an example of making a handle for a mug 100 times before you might begin to be competent at that task, and develop the muscle memory of the task. Her words ring even more true for me now.

I have come to understand that we often start from where we are. Obvious, yes. The experiences we have had will color what we see as possible. For me, jewelry was an obvious thing to make. I have worn jewelry for as long as I can remember. I have collections of antique and vintage jewelry. At a craft show, I have always been drawn to the jewelry. I know jewelry. I love jewelry. And my cranes came from a connection to that origami form.

But recently, I began to venture outside the familiar. When I began work on the Crane Project, I was scared to death. I knew nothing about this new terrain, or a project of this size or scale. I knew I was going to have to find a place to install the project. How do you find that? How does it get installed? How do I get the money to pay for it? How in the world does something so big and overwhelming ever happen?

I am still learning answers to many of those questions. But in the process, I have had my world expanded a bit. What seemed beyond me, and a world inhabited by others, more daring or more creative now seems like a place I might want to visit. I have had several ideas stirring up lately that I am excited about exploring. I don't know when there will be time to get to them, but nonetheless, I have experienced a shift.

When we move beyond what we know it is stretching our muscles. It may hurt. We may be rejected. We may not fit in. But, it may be worth the aches and pains on the way to creative growth. We grow when we go somewhere new, or try something different than what we already know how to do well. Growth is seldom going to happen by sticking with what you already know.

In the last few months, I have applied for, and been rejected for, several grants. A year ago, the idea of a grant was not even on my radar. I have now learned more about that process, and will continue to refine my approach. I have learned more about budgeting for a project. I have asked all sorts of people for all sorts of help. Some say no, but others say yes. Some days I feel like a politician running for office and trying to raise funds for the campaign. It is not what you are in this for, but if you don't do it, the other opportunities may not come your way.

By taking this step across the imaginary line of what I saw as possible, into the impossible, I feel like I am Alice in Wonderland. I have entered a new place, with all sorts of doors to explore and possibilities to consider. I may decide I want to go back to the safety of what I knew before, but I may end up feeling a creative expansion that would not have been possible if I did not step across that imaginary line. The line was only there in my head. I decided what I could do, and what was not possible. The line is mutable though. We can redraw it at any time. We can venture into areas we thought were off limits.

What you know and what you have done before does not have to set the boundaries for where you go in the future. They can be a foundation. A stepping stone. A safe harbor. We get to choose.

Do you have any lines you want to redraw?

Rest, Process and Integrate

I am still trying to process all that happened in Baltimore at the Synergy Conference. There are lots of summaries and reviews everywhere on the web. Since I took so few notes, I am not going to be much help with any details, for those of you who could not make it. But, I can offer some impressions....


1. Energy. There is nothing so electric as more than 200 people in a conference room who are all passionate about the same material. People who are at the forefront of the medium, and people who are virtually brand new. The trip to Baltimore was worth it just to be present in that conference room with all those people.


2. More thoughts on Energy. Synergy was a marathon. There was so much to offer, and so little time to absorb. So many people to connect with. So little time for a real conversation. I ended up skipping three of the seven classes I signed up for. On Monday afternoon I took the afternoon off to work on my presentation for the next day, and then ended up having a lovely conversation with Mari, whom I had not seen since I took a class with Kathleen Dustin back in 2004. No sooner did I leave that conversation, with the intent to head back to the hotel and work on that presentation, and I got snagged for a quick webcast interview. It will be posted on You Tube when it is done, so I will let you know when it is up there.


I eventually did get to the hotel, and did a quick review of my presentation, before I had to head back to the conference center. I missed the preview of the gallery, but it was worth taking a little time out to rest, and to connect.


3. Voice. A big topic at the conference, was finding your voice. This is easier said than done, of course. One reason why I do not take classes anymore, and I only took one, was because I find it is too easy to pick up the "accent" or "dialect" of the instructor.

My brother hated French in high school and struggled with it. He moved to French speaking Quebec after college for several years. He came back home with a French accent. He eventually lost that, but picked up a Boston accent, which he never had growing up in the area. I share this story as an illustration. Some people are very vulnerable to picking up someone's accent without even consciously thinking about it. If I sit down and talk with Leslie Blackford for more than five minutes, I will walk away talking like her for at least the next minute or two. I find her accent enchanting, and musical. I have to stop myself from continuing the charade of speaking like Leslie.


I do not want to carry another artist in my head for too long. Others can stay true to themselves without any problem. It is not easy, and sometimes we have to walk away from temptation.


4. There is nothing like meeting people face to face. Over and over again people exclaimed at putting the face with the name that had become so familiar on-line. Surprises that few "look like their work". "I thought you would be shorter, taller," .....or that the work would be bigger or smaller. I can't think of another time when so many polymer clay artists gathered in one spot and had a chance to meet and greet. Having a face and a voice to put with the name, or the blog, or the message on a forum will enrich connections for many.


5. Getting so many people together and having a conversation about things like workmanship, voice, our history as a medium, and it's influences, and where it is going is a wonderful idea. Opinions may not have changed, but at least we were thinking about it, and looking at our medium as something that can fit into the larger context of craft. It is a wonderful hobby medium since it is so accessible, but it also has the potential to extend far beyond that, and some of the people in that room are pushing those boundaries.


6. I had a blast teaching. This was a bit of a surprise. I found people were engaging, and did a wonderful job of adding to the material I was presenting. So "thank you" to any and all who attended either of my classes. It was fun!


7. Rest, Process, and Integrate. The next days, weeks and months will be about processing, resting and integrating what I learned, saw and heard at Synergy. Things will simmer and perculate in the coming days and weeks I am sure. Resting will have to wait a few more days. I have too many commitments on the calendar for too much rest right now.


8. Self-care. I found myself often needing a bit of time alone or quiet time in the day. Perhaps when you get used to working in isolation most of the time, three long days of classes and socializing is more than can be absorbed. I never made it down to the ACC show in the convention center, which is a shame, since I was right there. The schedule was tight, and when I had a bit of time, the last thing I wanted was more visual stimulation. In the past I would have pushed through and ignored my need for this time, but by skipping a few classes, and spending a bit of time alone, or talking with a friend one-on-one, I was better able to enjoy the moments I chose to participate. We really don't have to "do it all" to get the most out of an experience.


9. The "wow" of the new. Over and over, I heard exclaimations of excitement about Kathleen Dustin's new work, Ford + Forlano's new work, and I was excited to see new work from Judy Kuskin. Even when an artist has a strong, recognizable style, such as these polymer clay luminaries, it is important to continue to explore new terrain. Many others had new work at the show as well. Loretta Lam talked about developing several new lines of work before she headed to the Rosen show in Philadelphia, and what a wonderful response it received. This is the "continuous improvement" of the artrepreneur. What have you done lately?


Time to get the butt back in the studio chair. I missed my studio, and my family. It is good to be home.

Thank you to the extremely hard working people who put together, and managed to pull off an incredible event. Kudos all around.

Facing the Absolute Truth

Fact. We will all die eventually. A woman who has crossed my path in recent days has me thinking about how we come to terms with that fact, may just affect how we live the time we have.

Kimberly is my hero right now. Kimberly will be turning forty in February. In spite of doctor's predictions. I first met Kimberly, in passing, at a retreat last year. This was a day long retreat focused on personal growth and healing. At the time, she was not expected to live another year. Yet, she was spending a day, reflecting, examining, and opening her heart to the possible. Now you might expect given the circumstances that she might have spent that time in agonizing about how unfair it was, and why was this happening to her, and she had so many things she still wanted to do.

Kimberly was there to live her life, long or short, in the fullest way possible. This year when I went to the retreat again, there was Kimberly. I can't tell you how it made my heart lift to see her. Her hair was thin, and her face puffy from the ravages of the medications she has been taking. But her spirit was clearly alive. Her smile lit up her face, and her voice was one of hope and optimism.

We got to talking over lunch, and at one point we began talking about the cranes. I shared a few of the stories I have heard over the years from people about their connections with the cranes. This was when Kimberly exclaimed that I may have just solved her problem. She was planning a birthday party, for herself, in Key West, Florida next month. She and a dozen of her friends would be meeting up to celebrate her life, and the fact that she was still here to celebrate this birthday. She wanted to give a gift to each of her friends. Something that they would have, long after she was gone, that could help them remember her, and what her life was about. The cranes were the answer.

I will be making a dozen cranes for Kimberly in the coming days. They will have her birthdate under the wings. They will be small enough so someone can hold it in their hands, and remember Kimberly....and just how cute, and wonderful, and spiritual she is,... or was.

I have been blessed to have people like Kimberly come into my life. The cranes have brought these stories to me again and again. And each time I am connected to something way bigger than me.

I can only hope that I can face life with the courage, spirit, and joie de vivre that Kimberly does each and every day. I think of her, and I smile. Life is challenging and full of bumps and bruises. But, are we embracing the potential that it has to offer, everyday? Do we embrace life enough to want to work on our personal growth even as we stare down death?

Have you ever wondered what kind of art would you make if you were told you only had six months to live? Have you ever thought, maybe you should not wait until then to begin to make that art? Maybe, you won't get the six months warning.

Send your prayers and thoughts of healing Kimberly's way. The world could use someone like her a while longer. And go make some art like your life depended upon it. The world will be a richer place because of it.

The Customer is Always Right.....

You know the saying. The customer is always right.

Yesterday, I got a call from one of my new accounts. I had just shipped her some cranes last week. They were all of the hanging variety. She was expecting the sitting kind. I looked at the order form from the show....it showed hanging cranes.

My response,...I will get you a dozen new cranes sent out to you in the next few days. No charge. She offered to send back the ones I had shipped to her. Nope. I told her to keep those and see how they did. Perhaps hold them for the holidays when they would surely sell as ornaments.

She was very appreciative. She offered at least twice to send back the hanging cranes. No. I would absorb that.

Why? I had the "proof" that what she wanted was the hanging cranes. But what if what she intended was the sitting ones, and there was a miscommunication at the show? That could have been my fault or her fault. At this point, who knows and who cares. I want her to love my work. I want her to enjoy working with me. I want her to know that if there is any problem, it will be handled quickly and expediently. Anna Farmery of The Engaging Brand has an line she uses on her blog and her podcasts.

"People will forget what you said. People will forget what you did.
But people will never forget how you made them feel."

I wanted her to feel good about working with me. I wanted her to feel like I am a pleasure to work with. Not a pushover. But someone who will solve a problem with no fuss or confrontation. What if I had argued the point with her? Is the potential gain to me worth the cost? Or is the cost of a dozen cranes a better investment in a future relationship with this gallery. I am betting on the later. I will try to remember to let you know in another six months to a year if the decision was the right one. Even if it is not the right one financially, it feels right to me.

The other call I received yesterday afternoon was from a local free publication that covers about eleven towns. A gallery I work with had recommend me to her. They wanted to know if I was interested in being featured in a profile in their July issue. Of course!

Those positive relationships with others can bring back all sorts of things to you. I enjoy working with this gallery that had made the recommendation, and she does a great job selling my work. I would bend over backwards to accomdate her requests. Turns out, I was one of her top selling artists last year. Wow. Who knows when, where, why or how? Or even if, really. And it is not about doing these acts of "good karma" for the payoff. Yet, inevitably it does seem to come around again.

Pause, take a deep breath, and think before the reaction spills out. Sometimes, that is all it takes to figure out what feels like the right thing for you to do, whether it is a business issue, or a disagreement with your kids or spouse.

Thank you notes

Did your mother make you write thank you notes? If you are a mother now, do you have your kids write them? Do you write them? As an individual, or as a business person. Not an e-mail, but a real paper and pen note, sent the old fashioned way? I try to do it, but sometimes they slip for me. I have one right now that has been on my list for the last two months....late. Very late. But after I tell you this story, I am going to sit down and write it, stamp it and put it in the mailbox. And maybe a few more as well.

My nephew attends college in Vermont. He is a business major, and he just finished his sophomore year. He lost the job he had lined up for the summer, so he decided to start his own business instead. He and his friend, Ian decided to sell ice cream off an old converted school bus. They set up an independent project for the last semester, and with the guidance of a professor, set up the Short Bus Ice Cream company.

They bought the bus off of Craig's List. It needed some work, and it got a nice paint job.

The local bank provided some of the financing, along with family. The ice cream is Ben & Jerry's. They got some local publicity (above link), and used a local mechanic to do the modifications and repairs to the bus.

And, they sent out thank you notes. To all the people and companies who helped them make this happen.

So this week, they began their adventure. The first day out, the bus broke down. The alternator failed. Not only does that affect the operation of the bus, but also it feeds the electricity to the freezers for the ice cream. Can you say trouble? So, they head for the mechanic who worked on the bus in the past. They pull up the bus, and get out to calls of "It's the Ice Cream guys!" They go inside, and taped on the cash register is the thank you note they had sent to the mechanic.

They explain their dilemna, and the response is fantastic. They tell them to plug the freezer in right away. They tell them they can fix it right then. Keegan and Ian offered free ice cream, but they insist on paying for it. The whole shop is turning circles to help these two guys get their business back on the road. They ended up leaving the bus there overnight to be repaired. The shop put in a better quality altenator and gave them a great deal on it.

Did the thank you note have anything to do with this outcome? Who knows? But it probably didn't hurt. It's the good karma thing. You acknowledge the effort someone put forth and it is appreciated and remembered.

When the boys got back on the road they had a great first day of sales. In two hours they sold more than $200 worth of ice cream. And they were having a blast. According to my nephew, this is the most fun he has ever had working. I couldn't be happier for him. He has figured out that he can follow his dreams, and make something happen. (Remember yesterday's post about the impossible?) And he already has a great story or two.

After his mother told me the story I asked if he was blogging. She said she didn't think he had the time.....so I'm sharing his story with you here, because I think it is a great one. Have an amazing summer guys! You deserve it. And if you're in Burlington, Vermont this summer and see the Short Bus, buy a pop, and say "hi" to Keegan and Ian. In the meantime, do you have any thank you notes that need writing??

Horoscopes

I have my horoscope on my home page. I know horoscopes are hogwash, but they are a fun way to start the day. Today this was what my horoscope said. "You may find yourself unexpected busy today, dear Gemini. It could be that you had been planning on spending the day at home, tidying up and generally straightening and reorganizing your home environment. An unexpected change of plans could have you spending most of the day at the office, handling one crisis or another."

I don't know about the cleaning part, but today was going to be a bit of a breather to catch up and get organized before the last crunch. That was until I got a phone call this morning from my bank. It seems that someone was using my card to buy train tickets in France.....oh, that it were me! But no. My travel plans are for Las Vegas, not traveling by rail in France. And the Visa has seen some heavy action in recent days as I get ready for my show. Some of those charges, like the charge to UPS freight to ship my two containers out to Las Vegas, had not gone through yet. The containers were happily on their way to Las Vegas, and they hadn't been paid for yet. Then there are those automatic bill payments....more phone calls. And a trip to the police station to file a police report. Does it sound anything like my horoscope? Funny how that works some days, isn't it?

For the rest of you Gemini's out there, I hope your day is going better than mine, so far. And for the person who bought those train tickets.....at least send some pictures!

Akeelah, Nelson and Marianne

Have you ever seen the movie, Akeelah and the Bee? It is a story about a little girl who has a gift for spelling. It may not seem like much of a gift to some, but given the rest of the struggles in this little girl’s life, her gift gives her strength and will. When every possible obstacle gets in her way, she still manages to find a way to live out her gifts.

Recently someone reminded me of this movie, and a quote in that movie. After Akeelah is recognized as a prodigy, she is hooked up with a mentor. This mentor reads or recites (can’t remember which right now) the following to Akeelah:

"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate.
Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.
It is our Light, not our Darkness, that most frightens us.
We ask ourselves, 'Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?'
Actually who are you NOT to be?
You are a child of God.
Your playing small does not serve the world.
There's nothing enlightening about shrinking so that other people won't feel unsure around you. We are born to manifest the glory of God that is within us.
It is not just within some of us; It is in every one.
As we let our light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same.
As we are liberated from our fear, our presence automatically liberates others."

These words were written by Marianne Williamson, and spoken by Nelson Mandela when he became president of South Africa in 1994. I guess you could say it goes back to my earlier post, “This Little Light of Mine”. We all have some way that we need to shine. Hiding your talents and gifts does not serve you or anyone else.

If you have never seen the movie, I highly recommend getting a copy of it and watching it. Get some tissues. Crying is likely involved! This morning I printed out a copy of this quote to post where I will see it regularly. Feel free to do the same. We all need reminders from time to time.

Not so Fast, Karma part 2

Yesterday, I thought the apple vessel I had donated to help raise funds for Robin Whittemore's cancer treatment had been sold. Sadly, that is no longer the case. EBay is known for scams, and apparently we were subject to one of them. The buyer had gotten their eBay ID that same day, and chose the "Buy It Now" option. They had no feedback, and no apparent history. But when we tried to bill them, we learned that their ID had been suspended due to unresolved issues with eBay.

So it is back on the block. And I hope we only recieve genuine bids this time around. After doing a little poking around on eBay this afternoon, this is a new "game" on eBay. People set up a new ID, buy lots of things with the Buy It Now option, with no intention of paying....and then the seller is stuck with listing fees for an item that never sold. In some cases it seems, people will swoop in at the last minute and get an item, only to stiff the seller. The usual items that are targeted in these scams are electronics: cell phones, cameras, computers, video games, etc. I guess eBay is getting smarter about stopping this activity earlier. The sad thing is, these people are like the Whack a Mole game. They will just pop up again in a new way.

Ebay has such potential to be a great place to buy and sell. Now it seems to be a place with many cautionary tales. I am not saying I will never use eBay to buy or sell anything. Only that it is a sad commentary on the world that such a marketplace attracts so many looking to con or scam. Especially when one considers the innocent beginnings of eBay....a place for Pez collectors to buy and sell their peices.

You can see what items are listed to sell for Robin by searching "4Robin".

Good Karma

It is always good to see artists that "play nice" together. Sometimes fear, envy, or other issues get in the way, and artists will have a hard time sharing with others. The fear of being copied is huge.

But with polymer clay and metal clay the opposite is usually true. People are very open and sharing with one another about techniques and ideas. I suppose it is because both are very new media. There is so much to be explored still. And one idea feeds another.

The Metal Clay list on Yahoo is one of the most vital and creative groups I know. They have monthly challenges for the group....trying out a new technique or designing around a theme perhaps. We all grow as artists from this process, even if it is just as an observer.

One of the artists on the group had breast cancer quite a few years ago. She was in remission for about 8 years. But now the cancer is back, and in a more aggressive form. She needs a bone marrow transplant. She cannot work because of her compromised immune system, and thus has no health insurance. Instead she is on Medicare, and unless she has a perfect match, they will not pay for the transplant. But without the transplant, her chances of survival are nil. Sadly, this story is one too many of us can understand. Whether personally, or through friends or neighbors.

But here comes the good karma. The Metal Clay list took their creative energies and applied it to this challenge. How can we raise money for Robin so she can get her bone marrow transplant? An auction has been set up on eBay. Donations are being made to her medical fund. None of this may come close to covering her vast expenses, yet it is so wonderful to see how people will come together for someone they know only through an internet connection, and gather their collectionve energies to help.

An auction has been set up on eBay. If you searchfor "4Robin" you will see the items that are currently up for auction. A holiday gift purchase could help Robin come closer to getting the care she needs. You can read more about Robin's story and make a donation at her website http://www.fightforherlife.org.

I donated an apple vessel and a crane to the auction. The crane was donated for its symbolism....long life and healing. It seemed a natural fit for the cause, and reflected my hopes for Robin.

The apple vessel was one that I made over a year ago. I had loved the way it came out, and it always got an enthusiastic response at shows....yet it never came close to being sold. I was starting to feel badly about the piece. So I decided to donate it to the auction. Do something positive with it. Well today, the karma shifted. The apple was quickly purchased with the "Buy It Now" option. I now love the piece again. It is bringing Robin a little bit of help, and I feel good that someone fell in love with it enough to buy it up right away. I think I will have to revisit this design...perhaps in some other colors. But now the name will have to be "Robin's Apple" or "Robin's Pear".

So to that purchaser....Thank you! And to Robin....I am sending you thoughts of healing.